Liberian ex-rebel confesses to killings - Yahoo News
One of Liberia's most notorious rebel commanders, known as Gen. Butt Naked for charging into battle wearing only boots, has returned to confess his role in terrorizing the nation, saying he is responsible for 20,000 deaths.
Butt wait, it gets better:
His nom de guerre is derived from his platoon's practice of charging naked into battle, a technique meant to terrify the enemy.
I usually think, "oh good, no body armor, shoot 'em anywhere" but maybe that's just me. "What is your major malfunction Private Fatbody?! Don't you want to look good on the field with a nice tight ass and washboard abs as you run naked into a VC platoon?!"
So there's your thankful thought of the day, that Full Metal Jacket wasn't recording this sort of thing.
If you wonder why humanity got the fuck away from its cradle...
The civil war, which killed an estimated 250,000 people in this nation of 3 million, was characterized by the eating of human hearts and soccer matches played with human skulls. Drugged fighters waltzed into battle wearing women's wigs, flowing gowns and carrying dainty purses stolen from civilians.
Eddie Izzard only thought he was being funny with his joke about the First Transvestite Airborne Brigade.
Not enough? Motley Crue, all you 80s rockers using satanic imagery, EAT YOUR HEARTS OUT:
Before he led his fighters into battle, wearing only a pair of lace-up boots, Blahyi said he made a human sacrifice to the devil.
If there's anywhere that needs massive human aid shipments of date rape drugs, non-violent seduction methods, and maybe some books on incest as a viable alternative it's this place:
Because the violence was so widespread it's not uncommon to find Liberian families that have both victim and perpetrator under the same roof — a daughter who was raped and a son who took up a gun and went on to rape the daughters of other families.
Holy fucking shitballs, Africa knows how to party down and by party down I mean a definition of party from some weird Cenobite controlled alternate reality.
THIS is a perfect example of why neither the rest of the world nor the Africans themselves have any idea how to fix that continent. It is often so far removed from the things we think are atrocities we cannot conceive of the depths of human sadism that go on and yet are completely normal and human, when humans let go of anything approaching rational altruistic thought AND we insist that people there can't think like everyone else does, and everyone else includes all of their descendant relatives around the world from Europe to America whether close such as African-Americans or far removed like everyone else. How inhumane and unsupportive can we be to write off people and say they are incapable of doing better?
You multicultural morons who want to discourse on different cultures bringing different mores, shut the fuck up.
The African peoples can do better. We know they can. THAT is why it is so shocking. Deep down we know these are no different people than us. And that scares the fuck out of us. This is Lord of the Flies sucks off Hostel butt fuck slammed into Dawn of the Dead. This is what happens when you strip the trappings we wear wrapped around our psyches like security blankets away. We could all be charging into battle naked after sacrificing people to the devil and relaxing later with a nice game of pick-up soccer using someone's severed head.
I guess in a weird way as bad as the Armenian Genocide, Holocaust, and Balkan Slaughters were, they could have been worse. EASILY.
G-d bless and keep the people of Africa and take care of our forbear relatives and keep them safely far far away from our patronizing lack of encouragement. It seems we've only influenced the place straight into lunatic barbarism they didn't practice on this level before the outside world began tampering with them.*
I leave you with this quote from Lord of War which didn't even touch the surface:
Monrovia itself, was like being on another planet... Planet Monrovia... from the temperature it was obviously a planet close to the sun. I rarely saw another white man and I never left town alone. Outside town was the edge of hell. I didn't even wanna gaze into it.
*Cold-war proxy fights, colonial era conquest, UN meddling for political purposes, theft of African hopes to be on the same stage as the USA and Europe, lack of real and true international improvement and development funds going towards projects native Africans would like to do and build, you name it, we've screwed the place.
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